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XvX_NiChoLe_XvX
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Name: Nichole
Country: United States
State: Arkansas
Metro: Little Rock
Birthday: 8/6/1988
Gender: Female
Interests: mE deStRuiT
Expertise: i dreamt of living without you.
in a town of strange faces. i
cried for newborn babies and
i walked down unknown streets.
i didnt miss you once.
i wanted to leave.
Message: message meEmail: email me
Website: visit my website
Member Since:
8/26/2005
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| Tears come, I'm losing it quick, he gives me his hand, I'd given him everything. Awful tears down my awful face into the awful sea, his hand I'm squeezing so hard, I want to break its fucking bones. Out of sea the ivory tower'd've saved me.
I suppose I am but breaking down, sans adjective, breaking down in the simplest of manners, following the easiest road to zero, where bones go underwater.
He looks at me and lowers his eyes. Will we have wings when we're dead? he asks. Thinking of his hopeful lungs crammed out with saltwater makes me sad. A lot of good they'd do us underwater, says I. Then fins, says he, We shall have fins when we're dead.
I am a cadaver, they'd told me, Something to be picked apart, and by then I was already weeping, trying to crawl from the spot where they had put me down. I rolled onto my back, as to die in the correct manner, it must have taken the better part of the day. The last thing I recall, for once, he is mine. | | |
| The brain is the blueprint for ones life, actions and reactions. The blueprint defines what lives we will lead, how we will treat others, how we will react in situations, what our interests will be and so forth. Your brain defines who you are and the individual life you live.
My question is, with that knowledge, would you try to change yourself? I only said the brain is like a blueprint; I didn't say the blueprint can't be changed. Our thoughts and ideas are nothing but chemical reactions between neurons in our brains. Chemicals tell you when to feel happy, chemicals tell you when to feel depressed. Chemicals tell you when to fear, when to judge, when to think, when to rationalize and when to act in anger. The signals sent through our brains can be controlled and altered.
If you had the ability to alter your concious, your perspective and ability to judgement, would you do it? If you could find a way to make yourself have a better life would you do it by changing who you are. | | |
| 1. Adam and Eve - God says "don't eat from the tree of knowledge." Adam and Eve eat anyway. God punishes them and all future generations of humans. Why? Sure, Adam and Eve disobeyed God, but before they ate the fruit and gained knowledge of good and evil, they had no way of knowing that disobeying god was wrong. Besides, if one subscribes to the notion of predestination, God knew ahead of time that they were going to do it. And if God knows all and sees all, even into the hearts and minds of men, he knew they were going to do it and could have easily prevented it.
2. Noah's Ark - If one believes this story, God committed the worst act of genocide in all of history. He was pissed off with man, so he wiped them all out, except for one family. Again, an omniscient, omnipotent God could have prevented man from ever doing wrong by him; and by the doctrine of predestination, God again knew that this was inevitable, and only he had the power to stop it.
3. Soddom and Gammorah - Again, genocide. But this is supposed to be God giving man a chance. Wrong. One more time, if predestination is true and God is all-powerful and all-knowing, he knew it was inevitable unless he intervened and he had the power to do so.
4. Moses and the Exodus - God "hardened the heart" of the Pharoah against Moses; he caused the Pharoah to deny Moses' plea of liberation, and then unleashed yet another genocide, this time on all of Egypt. An all-powerful God could have made the Pharoah comply, and he could have even prevented the Jews, his chosen people, from ever being enslaved to begin with. If the enslavement was a result of God being mad at the Jews, that isn't justification; again, he had, if he is all-powerful the ability to keep the Jews from ever straying from his path.
5. Job - God makes a bet with Satan that Job will not deny him, under any circumstances. Thus, God utterly ruins this man's life, taking away his livelihood and killing his family; just to prove a point. This also raises the question of why God allows Satan to exist; surely, as he is all-powerful, he can eliminate Satan and all evil, he just doesn't want to.
So who does God love? God loves sinners, because God loves to punish. He knows (according to predestination) that people are going to sin, and it could even be said that God (as "grand designer" of the universe) causes people to sin; if he writes out one's life ahead of time, he writes in the sin. He doesn't stop people from sinning; that would mean losing out on all the fun of wrath and fury. The notion that he doesn't intervene because he's "testing" us doesn't fit; he knows the result of the test ahead of time, he decides well in advance who will pass and who will fail, we have no choice in the matter.
Organized religion, as it is a method of social control, operates not on love, but fear. One worships God not because God loves him, or because he loves God; but because he fears the consequences of not worshipping. Do you follow God's word because you want to go to heaven, or because you don't want to go to hell? | | |
| "And Lot's wife, of course, was told not to look back where all those people and their homes had been. But she did look back, and I love her for that, because it was so human.
People aren't supposed to look back. I'm certainly not going to do it anymore." | | |
| Its complex, you know, the anatomy of a Second Guess. They say it's the thought that counts, but then I never thought anything more than halfway to close-enough, so I wonder where that leaves us. Up in the air somewhere, maybe, between actuality and idealogy. Idle smiles make liars out of us, like roadsigns screaming, "This Way To Wondeful" and "Second Chances Next Exit." Lies like the one where you were going to disappear quietly and dissolve the memories along the way because good old-fashioned forgetting is all you've got when drugs are too expensive in these parts, these days. Idle smiles and wishful thinking, the fine line between self-deception and laughter. Then I see you in my mirror and I think 'God, but you look lovely in longing.' That's usually what seals the deal, I suppose - sealed with a kiss, and I've made a roadside oasis out of this.
How many times do we have to forget before we remember that "try, try again" drops us off on Disaster's doormat time, after time, after time? | | |
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